1. WHO ARE THE MEMBERS OF YOUR BAND? TELL US WHY THEY ARE GENIUSES?
Hayden Lauridsen – he doesn’t need a drum kit to belt out a wicked groove (most gigs he gets away with just using foot stomp and thigh slap).
Mike Crawford – he slaps la-bass so hard that he needs to use barbed wire for strings... he was also freakishly born with steel fingers and thumb on his right hand.
Chris Gain – the word ‘Genius’ was actually the term coined for explaining the act of “fanging out on a guitar using your tongue or nipple ring”. The first person to do that was Chris Gain.
The Ring-ins (e.g. Chris Buckland, Matt Dan, The Lauridshorns and more) – the various guys who join the band from time to time are usually even more skilled and awesome than Hayden, Mike and Chris, so they must be geniuses!
2. DESCRIBE YOUR BANDS SOUND IN 10 WORDS OR LESS? (USE LOTS OF CLICHÉ DESCRIPTIVE WORDS HERE!)
Soul speak... blues banter... funk fever... hearty grooves.... thoughtful instrumentation
3. YOUR BAND FINALLY GETS AN ALBUM DEAL, WHAT WOULD YOU CHOOSE FOR YOUR COVER?
An image of a guy walking down the street, very casually, lugging around an old-school reel to reel tape recorder with head phones plugged in... Album title: Reel Music
Or - an image showing the point of view of a dust spec on the inside of an acoustic guitar looking out the sound hole... Album title: “The life of a dust spec on the inside of an acoustic guitar looking out the sound hole.”
Oh... and the font would be Helvetica Bold letters, 48pt, white on a black background.